Novella - SAFIA

Friday 29 July 2011

Another one bites the dust

Do you ever wonder about your destiny? What is planned for you in this world? Where are you supposed to end up or with whom? Sit there and imagine your life, but the image you spent your whole childhood and a good deal of your teenage years fantasising about, disappears, disintegrates into oblivion.
This might ring true more with single people or single girls shall I say, people in relationships or married think they have it all figured out, a married happy blissful life they don’t see it ending, they don't think their whole “dream” could be shattered in their pretty little faces.

People come in and out of your life, some will mark their passage and some will be forgotten and you ponder the reason for their passage, but if you choose to be mystical, there is always a reason we cross paths in life, nothing is left to chance, some might bring in change, perhaps good or bad, but necessary change, some will be the cause of something wonderful or dreadful, and some you are left wondering the point of their intrusion, who gave them the right to come into your life, in what capacity, for what reason, who wrote this schema anyway, and don’t I get a say in it?

Of course you do, you have a brain and mental capacities to make decisions, right or wrong, thought through or impulsive, they remain also intrinsically part of the schema.
Are you with me or have I lost you?

Believing in destiny is a great way of relieving the strenuous guilt and self deprecation, it was written you say, it was maktoob, but if you attempt to use your dormant grey matter and think, you can also say: it was my fault, my actions, my past has again triumphed and got the better of me, but then again it was meant to be, it’s part of the schema of life;
Which one comes first? The chicken or the egg?

The guards came down yesterday and the hit came in time to annihilate me, ohhhh I want my mummy, but I am 34 and I can't run back to her to cry on her lap.  Guards have to go back up, patience and perseverance are the way forward, arm myself with them and carry on, writing seems to flow better when I am sad anyway.

Dz-Chick…back on the shelf

45 comments:

  1. You are right about destiny and people coming to our lives to fullfil some kind of a purpose.....
    I had my fair share of this in my life and I am grateful for them, now, as they have made me the tough strong woman my husband fell in love with. So take what you can and move on as this one was not your destiny...Easier said than done, I know!

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  2. that was quick sista !
    another one bites the dust deja?
    on the plus side you'll be a good mouslima in Ramdan :)

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  3. Et oui!!
    I am always a good Muslima fi Ramdan!! Time to be good!

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  4. stay positive, the best is yet to come :) .

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  5. I have dated men from every corner of the world and I found they all have one thing in common' they're all are bastards'.Just add your last bastard into the list and move on.

    W

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  6. @Daode: thanks, am trying but it's hard :(

    @W: He's not a bastard that's the problem!! it makes it worse when you loose someone special!

    Am very very very upset!

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  7. DZChick, DZChic, DZCheeky

    Bon j'avais ecrit un truc intelligent et drole et j'ai fait une mauvaise manip et le texte a disparu. Tu sais ce que je pense, mariee ou pas, dans la vie on fait ce qu'on peut et ce qu'on veut aussi. Ta vie de couple, elle te ressemblera. Sinon c'est vraiment pas la peine.
    Je ne sais pas si cela te rassurera, mais je ne fais jamais de diner de couples et encore moins de vacances de couples. Et ca fait 15 ans qu'on est ensemble. D'ailleurs, je suis seule a la maison, passe si tu veux que je te fasse la cuisine. Je te previens, ni bourek, ni chorba>
    MT

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  8. Ah et en plus je me plante de post...je n'avais pas lu le dernier texte.
    J'aime bien Gainsbourg, mais avec l'age je prefere Leonard Cohen,

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  9. awww don't be too upset. keep yourself busy and surround yourself with good people, you'll get over it.
    or maybe you can work it out if possible.

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  10. Things do happen for a reason! always remember that our creator is watching over us.

    Ramadan is on Sunday, please give it your all and god all mighty will help you in your endeavours.

    Ramadan karim sister

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  11. The grass is always greener! Not everyone who is married is happy. Some people are victims of domestic violence, others in loveless sexless marriages, others not respected or admired by the one they are shackled to, others can't leave because they are afraid about what will happen to their children if they do, others are controlled and eroded until they forget who they are.

    Enjoy singledom whilst you can, wear what the hell you please, go wherever you want and hang out with whoever you please free from considering someone else's arbitary rules or considerations. Spend your money as you see fit and live wherever you want. If that doesn't cheer you up, pat yourself on the back and congratulate yourself for not having to deal with any in-laws!

    Chin up chick, Mr. Right is out there...

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  12. Awwww thanks everybody for the support. I do appreciate it.
    Merci MTF, I too like Gainsbourg :)
    Ramdan chez toi wella lala?

    @DAODE: that's the trick, am keeping busy and away from trouble or my phone!

    @Anonymous: Mr. Right is out there and I believe it...shame he wasn't my one, I thought I had found my soulmate.

    Ramadan will be a good time to think and consider my options, I can hear Algeria calling....FOR GOOD.

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  13. Hello DZ-Chick

    how are you doing?

    You are right but not all men are bastards there are also women are .... sure not all don't forget your father is man so is he bastard? for "'w"

    thank you dz-chick and take care ; saha Ramadanek

    ps: why you didn't subscribe ?in my forum !-_- i promised you i'll put your blog link

    ;) see ya

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  14. You are full of dignity and grace, even in a breakup situation. text is very subtle. well done

    you should change your name to dz-chic ;)

    J x

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  15. Teenay: I will subscribe today c'est promis. Saha Ramdanek

    @J: who are you? do I know you?
    I think MTF alreeady came up with DZ-CHIC for me :)
    Thank you for your lovely comment.

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  16. DZ-Chick,

    Yal 3dra, you are not back on the shelf!! you are just back on the road, to explore more the world, and as you met this person on your path, you will meet others too.

    We are never too old to run to mummy's lap and have a good cry, mothers are the only humans that have the power to makes us feel like babies when we need it,( and some fathers), I know my mummy is.

    Life is weired sometimes, we get happy, we get sad, but la vie continue.
    I do believe that when you meet somebody you like, it is a sign that you will meet somebody else you may like even more, if you were loved by one, you will be loved more by somebody else.

    Keep your head wayyyy high up, things will get better.

    Love you Chick, and My thoughts are with you.
    Saha ramdanek hbiba.

    Nedjma

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  17. Any chance for you to come and spend sometime with me in the American North West??
    Nature is soo beautiful and very healing here. My doors are WIDE OPEN for you.
    And I make a very delicious Chorba, and Bourek, and l'ham lahlou, or chbah essofra ;)

    Cheers my dear :)

    Nedjma

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  18. Merci Nedjma, true words and very kind. I guess he wasn't mine, my man is still out there!
    As for the US of A, I would love to hon, but can't take holidays right now! saving them for Xmas/NY to run away from the cold.

    ehhhh ya Nedjma! t'as vu!!!

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  19. Hi DZ, it's been awhile since I left a comment, but I have been following you from time to time.
    I can't resist dropping you a comment on the destiny stuff though...
    I see it simple - there are only two ways of looking at it.
    1- destiny does not exist, it is a figment of wishful imagination. It is so completely illogical to imagine that anything is predetermined and that we have a 'fate'.
    2 -Destiny does exist. However, it is impossible to know what your destiny is to be. We can only know things as they happen.
    The outcome is the same - wondering about or believing in destiny doesn't actually help to either address problems or understand ourselves.
    D.

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  20. Ma cherie,

    Ehhhh oui ma puce, je vois bien, wesh t'habi hadi hiya ednya el khada3a.

    La vie continue, et rien n'arrive sans bonne raison, chaque experience nous apprends quelque chose de bon, dure a croire biensure, mais tu le verras bien un jour, I love ou my dear, hang in there.

    Nedjma

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  21. Faromosa: welcome back :)
    I wondered what you would have to say about this particular post (I swear) since I know you had some opinions about the subject since the last time. It is true, whether we believe in fate or not, it remains impossible to find solutions or understand the causability of things, but for me it helps to believe that there is a schema and an outline for all of us, what we do might not be planned ahead but it's part of the schema of life...do I make sense?

    @Nedjma: I am actually feeling ok now, got used to it by now lol

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  22. ramadan kareem dzc. alora comment se passe ta première journée?

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  23. Thanks Daode, do you observe Ramadan? I don't supose you're Muslim.

    La premiere journée is going ok so far, already 13h30 and no sign of hunger, thurst or tirdness, so am happy...

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  24. i do and i am. you're funny ;) .

    bon courage.

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  25. You do! so how is your first day going? answer me later on my blog Ramadan diary to be posted after Iftar

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  26. @Dz-Chick, wach mazalak tachki?

    @Nedjma, nti ba3da ta3ardhi l'almarican bel ma3rifa?? soit a3ardhina ga3 wela walou!

    @Haniya, A3ardhini ndji nakoul mais lazamli a doggy bag aussi.

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  27. dz - Yes, completely understand. So many things we do are driven by keeping ourselves comfortable. The 'big scheme' of it all is a nice, comforting thought. Easy to snuggle up to :-)
    (Glad you remembered my similar previous... But now worried that I have a mono-brain. Can only think one thing and keep repeating it endlessly. )

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  28. Naaa not mono-brained! You just have more to say on the subject I guess!

    Glad you stuck around :)

    How is Korea?

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  29. GMA! Saha ramdanek! Wesh wakila ghalbak ramdan ya m'haynek ;)
    My door is wide open for you, DZ-Chick, and who ever wants to joing you.
    En plus, n'tayebelkoum, ou tediou meme doggies bags ou kalb el louze on top of that :)
    Aya chiche!!

    Nedjma

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  30. DZ-bogossa...ya weddi nass bekri ygolo khalik min li y3ayik..alors yro7 ybi3 lbatata..his loss my love, not yours...
    I hope to meet you one day zina...xx

    GMA hih machi mouchkal..arwah bark..

    Nedjma, thanks for the invite..inchlah one day..xxx

    saha ftourkom

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  31. Haniya - I am sure we will meet one day perhaps. x

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  32. DZ - Korea has been great so far. Apart from the endless rain To find out more about it you would need to read something I posted the other day. Decided to finally start writing again. Big step for me. If you go there you might be the first to read it!

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  33. DZ - ah, I'm a little slow on the uptake. I started to wonder how did you know I was in Korea?? That's because you already read it :-). It's late here so I have an excuse.

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  34. Formosa: Yeah read it and loved it, tried to post a couple of comments but it would not let me.

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  35. Hopefully just fixed that by messing about with incomprehensible settings. The reason you couldn't post is incompetence, not anti-social behaviour.

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  36. I am back into your chrnological track...now I got it ...that you're still single,...but believe don't worry li maho lik e3ayik...this guy even he was very nice, it wasn't meant to be between you too!

    My advice: take it easy, live your life...when time comes you'll never notice it, until u find out that you have tied the knots with your future hubby!

    Courage and enjoy life to the max dz-chick!...after all this is just life!

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  37. Thanks for the advice Dz Cheikh, I am fine now, as you say, am just living my life...whatever comes my way, we shall see

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  38. or whoever you might go across his way!...kech chorba?...is it still gray cold and misearable over there? even in August...

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  39. Je pense aussi qu'il faut provoquer les choses quand même...

    Faut pas parler de bouffe, rak teddi f'dnoub :)
    (Kiddin')

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  40. That too DZ Cheikh...that too!
    I am going out to dinner tonight so not sure they'll be shorba involved, and yes it's grey but not cold...18 degrees!

    S: C'est vrai que je ne fais rien du tout pour provoquer les choses! RIEN!

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  41. Get a mushroom soup that's delicious...Saha ftorek and Saha Ftorkom ...all soon iftar over here!

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  42. Mushroom soup is not my thing! en fin de compte I had chorba and it was yummy
    A demain

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  43. DZ-chick you are very wise. Every single encounter in our life is deisgned to teach us something valuable which subsequently will lead to self-development! I feel like giving you a HUGE hug! Que sera sera khouti xx

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